Jennifer Love Hewitt says “she’s still figuring out how to be a parent”

She says she’s still figuring out how to be a parent, but she sounds pretty good at it! Working mom Jennifer Love Hewitt and her Client-List-co-star-turned-husband-turned-9-1-1-co-star, Brian Hallisay, have a son and a daughter who are less than two years apart. But Autumn, and Atticus, couldn’t be more different personality-wise.

Whereas Autumn is shy and into crafts, Atticus is all, “RAWR!” Jennifer says, mimicking a dinosaur, in an exclusive interview with Working Mother. He’s all about physical play.

“Autumn will be fine the first time he pushes her a bit or pulls her hair, but most of the time, we have to go and intervene,” the mom admits. However, she and Brian would prefer the kids work things out themselves.

The night before our interview, the family reached a milestone. The couple was having dinner when they heard a little voice from the playroom assert herself.

“‘You know what, Atticus?” Jennifer explains Autumn saying, “’I think I’ve had enough of that now and I would like some space please.’” Success! Atticus backed off, and the parents were proud of both kids.

“Even at this age we teach my son that Autumn is going to have boundaries,” Jennifer says, hoping the message will stick through Atticus’ adult years—and that this is practice for Autumn, too, for setting boundaries in her dating life. “Maybe they’ll remember the playroom,” their mom posits.

The couple’s neatest parenting trick just might be who they choose to send in for different situations. They’ve found that certain lessons are best conveyed to the kids by the opposite-sex parent.

For instance, “When Atticus gets rambunctious, male energy isn’t the best thing to calm that down. So Mommy goes in and I’ll be like, ‘Oh, buddy, it’s not going to be fun, and on the playground people aren’t going to want to be friends, if we’re throwing or pushing or getting too crazy. Just calm down, give Mommy a hug,’ and immediately he will do that.

Then, Autumn is dealing with somebody at school who has hurt her feelings, so it’s an interesting time for my husband to be like, ‘You know how great you are, how strong confident, beautiful, how smart, you know all of those things.’ There’s something about me talking to her that doesn’t have the same effect.”