Jessica Simpson regrets ‘It’s been a long hard deep emotional journey and It took her six years to reveal what had happened”

The 39-year-old singer opened up about how a visit to her doctor made her realize that her dependency could kill her.In a heartwrenching excerpt obtained by PEOPLE from her memoir Open Book, Jessica revealed the sexual abuse that changed her life forever.

She talked about how at six years old, she was abused by a family friend “when [she] shared a bed with [their] daughter.”She continued: “It would start with tickling my back and then go into things that were extremely uncomfortable.”

As to why she didn’t tell her parents, she wrote: “I wanted to tell my parents. I was the victim but somehow I felt in the wrong.”It took her six years to reveal what had happened at the family friend’s house.

She told her parents during a car trip and her mom, Tina, immediately told her dad, Joe Simpson, that she had known something was off with their daughter.She wrote in her book: “Dad kept his eye on the road and said nothing.

“We never stayed at my parents’ friend’s house again but we also didn’t talk about what I had said.”The singer also talked about how even though her fans saw a young singer who was in love with her then-husband, Nick Lachey, she was hiding so much underneath.

In 2010, she married current husband Eric Johnson and they have children together: seven-year-old Maxwell, six-year-old Ace and 10-month-old Birdie.

Only her closest friends and family members knew that she was spiraling until she hit rock bottom in 2017 at a Halloween party.

She wrote that she told her friends: “I need to stop. Something’s got to stop. And if it’s the alcohol that’s doing this, and making things worse, then I quit.”

She also made the decision after her doctor told her that her dependency on alcohol and pills could kill her.

She wrote in her book that she got sober in November 2017, she said: “I was killing myself with all the drinking and pills.”

“Honesty is hard but it’s the most rewarding thing we have and getting to the other side of fear is beautiful.”
She wrote in her book that she got sober in November 2017, she said: “I was killing myself with all the drinking and pills.”“Giving up the alcohol was easy. I was mad at that bottle. At how it allowed me to stay complacent and numb.”

The fashion designer also talked about how she’s using her pain as inspiration for her songs and everything she does.

She wrote: ‘It’s been a long hard deep emotional journey, one that I’ve come through the other side with pure happiness and fulfillment and acceptance of myself.”I’ve used my pain and turned it into something that can be beautiful and hopefully inspiring to people.”